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Dazed and confused -that's what it's like when the publication of your first book is imminent. (at least for me)

For those of you who love Letterman, here's the:

Top Ten Stupidest Questions You Ask Your Agent, Editors, Writing Partner (Margie), or Blog Girls (at least if you're me):

10. They want to buy the book? Are you sure? (to agent)

9. Can they change their minds? (to agent and M after offer was accepted)

8. How long could to edit the book? A Month? (to M)

7. What's this? (in reference to the 5 page, single-spaced editorial letter for the draft) Do we have to do all this? (both to M)

6. What's an ARC? (to M & agent)

5. There's another edit???? (to M)

4. What are the first pass pages? (to editors)

3. Can we ask to go to DC, so I can get my friends from elementary school to show up for the signing? (This was to avoid a signing, at which M & me would be the only ones in attendance.) (to M)

2. What is a TweetDeck? Do I need this? (to M, who always knows these thing before me)

1. Melissa Marr & Michelle Zink are reading OUR book??? (to all of the above)

At this point, you may be thinking that if I'm this stupid, I shouldn't be allowed to have my book published. I prefer to consider myself a publishing virgin. In my defense, I've spent the last 13 years holed up in classrooms teaching.  (These things didn't come up in there.)

I've decided that when your first book is being published, you should be assigned a mentor whose sole responsibility is to remediate – you know, help you catch up to the rest of the class. In addition to Sarah, Courtney, Jen, Julie & Margie – Pseudonymous Bosh, Melissa Marr, Michelle Zink & Vania have been helping out. (I have LOTS of questions.)

So far today, Michelle had to explain what an RSS feed was and how to link my blog to Amazon, and Vania had to help me find our mention in PW.

I think I might be a lot of work. (Marg, you don't get to weigh-in on that.)